Once again, I review a game that isn't entirely bad, but sure as hell isn't all that good. Today it's Nitro Platform, a game that likes to keep things simple - very simple.
In Nitro Platform, you play a rectangle that has to run around a series of single screen levels collecting stars.
This is gaming in 2008. But hey, at least it's good to see at least one of the Pong paddles is still finding work. There are two modes, Normal and High Score. Let's take a look at Normal Mode first.
The sheer simplicity of the game means at least you can play an arcade platformer without having to learn eighteen different button combinations so that you can assault your foes with the Eternal Sky Hammer of Burning Fury, or some other awkwardly named made up karate move. No, here, you just move a rectangle around and collect a few dozen stars. You also have to avoid the occasional exploding block. Pieces of platform will explode at random intervals and are best avoided. But if this is the worst you have to deal with then there's not much to worry about. As long as you can avoid falling through the holes in the floor you should be perfectly fine. You also have three lives with which to play and it saves after every level, so if the exploding blocks prevent anyone from finishing this game I'd be very fucking surprised.
The game doesn't look half-bad, but there's no escaping the fact that the levels are all practically the same. The only thing that changes is the rate at which blocks explode, but like I already stated, this is not the challenge the developers thought it was and you're usually on the other side of the screen when it happens anyway.
They really went wild on Level 5 though - every colour in the rainbow. I suppose the challenge here is trying to tell the normal red blocks from the ones that are about to explode. Here's a clue - they're a different shade of red and just look like blank squares.
And then that's it - that is Normal Mode. To some, its brevity might be a virtue, but to me it just smacks of laziness, especially as every level is the same God damn thing.
High Score Mode allows you to play on a variety of levels (like it matters) in an attempt to collect as many stars as possible before you get blown up or fall through a crack in the floor. So, long story short, it's the same as Normal Mode except it never ends.
Whereas Normal Mode is so short as to be almost non-existant, High Score mode can potentially last for as long as it takes for all of the blocks to explode. And since we've already played through Normal Mode, this gets real old, real fast.
So, Nitro Platform - it could be worse, but then so could my dental hygiene and no one's cutting me any slack for that.